WOO HOO!!!!!
for full list of accepted graphics see here.
23 April, 2007
22 April, 2007
oh, roman...
step aside jason lee, i have a new boyfriend...
roman abramovich: gorgeous russian, world's sexiest billionaire, and mine... aaaalllll mine.
it's actually not his money that i'm attracted to (though it's not a bad thing either), it's his 24/7 5 o'clock shadow and that really sexy spot of white hair on the left side of his chin. *shiver*
i think i'm going to take up soccer and russian.
roman abramovich: gorgeous russian, world's sexiest billionaire, and mine... aaaalllll mine.
it's actually not his money that i'm attracted to (though it's not a bad thing either), it's his 24/7 5 o'clock shadow and that really sexy spot of white hair on the left side of his chin. *shiver*
i think i'm going to take up soccer and russian.
17 April, 2007
hockey hair
hockey hair is cool. it's sexy, fun, wavy, soft, AWESOME to run your fingers through, and just plain ol' neato. that's why i'm going for it.
yeah... me. i don't know why (i never try to fake like i do).
what inspired me to paint my nails black with my sister a few weeks ago?
what made me crazy enough to pierce my dick three separate times in three separate places?
what causes me to love tattoos? (i'm waiting for a friend to figure out what she wants then we're going and i'll be getting my fourth).
why do i wear my shit-kickin' boots to work?
why do i laugh at "dead baby" jokes, cry at poop jokes, and plain ol' lose it at boob jokes?
why do i cease all beard trimming for months at a time?
why do i LUST AFTER pabst blue ribbon beer in 16oz cans?
what IS it that makes me go absolutely cuckoo-bananas at the mere thought of jason lee?
why do i actually believe that self improvement is masturbation?
why am i a full-time working adult AND a full-time grad school student at the same time?
why do i practically get a hard-on thinking about nasal irrigation?
why do i detest cats but love my pussy?
why do sexual innuendos still make me giggle like a 4th grader?
why do i have a picture of my mechanic on my desktop?
why, Why, WHY???
*shrug*
i guess it's because it's all so fun. lol - so freakin' fun!
yeah... me. i don't know why (i never try to fake like i do).
what inspired me to paint my nails black with my sister a few weeks ago?
what made me crazy enough to pierce my dick three separate times in three separate places?
what causes me to love tattoos? (i'm waiting for a friend to figure out what she wants then we're going and i'll be getting my fourth).
why do i wear my shit-kickin' boots to work?
why do i laugh at "dead baby" jokes, cry at poop jokes, and plain ol' lose it at boob jokes?
why do i cease all beard trimming for months at a time?
why do i LUST AFTER pabst blue ribbon beer in 16oz cans?
what IS it that makes me go absolutely cuckoo-bananas at the mere thought of jason lee?
why do i actually believe that self improvement is masturbation?
why am i a full-time working adult AND a full-time grad school student at the same time?
why do i practically get a hard-on thinking about nasal irrigation?
why do i detest cats but love my pussy?
why do sexual innuendos still make me giggle like a 4th grader?
why do i have a picture of my mechanic on my desktop?
why, Why, WHY???
*shrug*
i guess it's because it's all so fun. lol - so freakin' fun!
08 April, 2007
just another day?
this is the first time in 28 years that i have not ridden the paschal rollercoaster.
the rollercoaster ride starts during advent when the car slowly creeps toward an apex that can only end in a glorious celebration of the birth of the christ child. after a few weeks/months in ecstasy the car plunges into the depths of despair on ash wednesday when christians around the world begin 40 days of constant reminding of their general unworthiness, inability to be “saved”, and despair over not being able to be in the light of the universe all on account of being human. one would think this despair would end on the most holy of sundays, easter but no, easter does nothing more than give christians one more excuse to fall at the feet of the “throne of grace” to grovel as, once again, unworthy human scum.
do you realize that when calculating the lenten season in a person’s live that a christian adult that is 50 years old has spent approximately five and a half YEARS in a state of lamentation over their unworthiness of being able to be in the presence of their own creator? they get over this damning feeling by using christ as a literal scapegoat for their unworthiness which, supposedly, gives them peace. i think the biggest despair is that these adults allow themselves to be duped into believing that they’re not worthy of anything that is given to them by the universe.
i guess there’s no better time than today, easter sunday, to state that i no longer fall for that bullshit. i believe that humans are beautiful and perfect as they are. i believe that humans are worthy of love by the universe and i believe that humans are powerful beyond their wildest dreams. evil exists in the world because humans refuse to acknowledge their power and their status of “loved.” the greatest sin of all is when a human willingly allows themselves to believe that they don’t deserve happiness.
i refuse to grovel at the feet of a sexist, jealous, violent, homophobic god… i stand up tall and proud and worship in the beauty of the holiness that surrounds me by a universal power that is truly loving and accepting and doesn’t wish harm on anyone… even if they don’t believe in it’s existence.
the rollercoaster ride starts during advent when the car slowly creeps toward an apex that can only end in a glorious celebration of the birth of the christ child. after a few weeks/months in ecstasy the car plunges into the depths of despair on ash wednesday when christians around the world begin 40 days of constant reminding of their general unworthiness, inability to be “saved”, and despair over not being able to be in the light of the universe all on account of being human. one would think this despair would end on the most holy of sundays, easter but no, easter does nothing more than give christians one more excuse to fall at the feet of the “throne of grace” to grovel as, once again, unworthy human scum.
do you realize that when calculating the lenten season in a person’s live that a christian adult that is 50 years old has spent approximately five and a half YEARS in a state of lamentation over their unworthiness of being able to be in the presence of their own creator? they get over this damning feeling by using christ as a literal scapegoat for their unworthiness which, supposedly, gives them peace. i think the biggest despair is that these adults allow themselves to be duped into believing that they’re not worthy of anything that is given to them by the universe.
i guess there’s no better time than today, easter sunday, to state that i no longer fall for that bullshit. i believe that humans are beautiful and perfect as they are. i believe that humans are worthy of love by the universe and i believe that humans are powerful beyond their wildest dreams. evil exists in the world because humans refuse to acknowledge their power and their status of “loved.” the greatest sin of all is when a human willingly allows themselves to believe that they don’t deserve happiness.
i refuse to grovel at the feet of a sexist, jealous, violent, homophobic god… i stand up tall and proud and worship in the beauty of the holiness that surrounds me by a universal power that is truly loving and accepting and doesn’t wish harm on anyone… even if they don’t believe in it’s existence.
03 April, 2007
carrie
i remember a sex and the city episode where carrie noted that chronically-single people get the shaft because they never get the chance to enjoy the abundance of gifts that are showered upon people when they get married or have a kid. i have to say that, in a non-bitter way, i agree with her... it really is the shaft sometimes.
i never plan on marrying (not even noting the obvious that i CAN'T) nor do i plan on having kids... i guess that just makes people like me stronger... *shrug*
and oddly enough, unlike most situations, i really am not bitter. i think i'm not bitter because i don't even WANT to begin to have the type of life that a married couple or parents have (it's just not the life for me). so i guess that not getting the extra abundance showered on me by friends or co-workers is a gift in itself. a gift that is showing me that, indeed, i am living the life that i'm happy with.
but i wouldn't turn down a set of waterford martini glasses as a "you're cool" gift because, well, you know, you'd buy them for me if i was getting married or popping an 8 lb kid out of my vagina = )
i never plan on marrying (not even noting the obvious that i CAN'T) nor do i plan on having kids... i guess that just makes people like me stronger... *shrug*
and oddly enough, unlike most situations, i really am not bitter. i think i'm not bitter because i don't even WANT to begin to have the type of life that a married couple or parents have (it's just not the life for me). so i guess that not getting the extra abundance showered on me by friends or co-workers is a gift in itself. a gift that is showing me that, indeed, i am living the life that i'm happy with.
but i wouldn't turn down a set of waterford martini glasses as a "you're cool" gift because, well, you know, you'd buy them for me if i was getting married or popping an 8 lb kid out of my vagina = )
27 March, 2007
oh man
do you even KNOW how hard it is to write a paper when you're sitting in the huge warehouse window of a boho coffee shop when it's twilight and pouring rain outside???
NO! ARGH! seriously, the uber-romanticized evening sun setting in the midst of a spring shower that is covering everything with a puddle of wholesome, nourishing, life-giving rain.
*sigh* i'm destined to forever romanticize life as it continues to infect my life with non-stop distraction.
NO! ARGH! seriously, the uber-romanticized evening sun setting in the midst of a spring shower that is covering everything with a puddle of wholesome, nourishing, life-giving rain.
*sigh* i'm destined to forever romanticize life as it continues to infect my life with non-stop distraction.
26 March, 2007
t.b.
picture it, this afternoon, on a walk with a straight guy friend.
me: so i think i'm going to start working out again.
straight guy friend (sgf): why?
me: i kinda have drive to.
sgf: ok...
me: well, last night there was this really really cute guy online and was flirting with me, but you know, he's totally cut. like, not in the huge muscle-head way but in the, well, you know, good looking way. he's got pecs and a six-pack and is really in shape... and well, i'm not. and he can totally see that in my profile... he can't miss it. and he was still flirting with me.
sgf: maybe he just wants a tubby bitch.
tubby bitch my ass...
me: so i think i'm going to start working out again.
straight guy friend (sgf): why?
me: i kinda have drive to.
sgf: ok...
me: well, last night there was this really really cute guy online and was flirting with me, but you know, he's totally cut. like, not in the huge muscle-head way but in the, well, you know, good looking way. he's got pecs and a six-pack and is really in shape... and well, i'm not. and he can totally see that in my profile... he can't miss it. and he was still flirting with me.
sgf: maybe he just wants a tubby bitch.
tubby bitch my ass...
07 March, 2007
doppel-WHA?
on sunday i was waiting in line for brunch w/ some friends when one of them turned around and stated in a very shocked voice, "i just saw your doppelganger!" having NO idea what the hell he was talking about i responded with an equally shocked, "WHAT?!?" and then promptly checked my fly. nope, everything was packaged up nicely.
he stated it again, "no, over there! your doppelganger!" once again i said, "what?"... well, this went on for a few cycles before i finally said, "no seriously, i have no idea what a doppelganger is." it's at the point that the cycle ended and he told me how a doppelganger was a person's twin, their lookalike, their other-half. and supposedly MY doppelganger was standing right behind me.
so, as covertly at possible, i spun around and began looking for a ruggedly-handsome man in his late 20's w/ a beard and hair that looked like it should have been cut two months ago. whouldn't you know, he WAS standing right behind me, and even more shocking was that, indeed, i found him quite attractive.
that's when i had two revelations only one of which i shared w/ my friends:
1) i am TOTALLY attracted to guys that look similar to me, i.e., facial hair, not primped, kinda rugged-ish, looks like they're quite comfortable in their own skin. note, i'm not attracted to guys LIKE me but that just guys that LOOK like me.
2) if i ever got the chance, i'd totally make out w/ myself.
this last revelation was kinda fun to think about at first but the more i used "doppelganger" in conversation the more i thought about making out w/ myself which made me think more and more that i was a freak.
now before you reply with a resounding "DUH!" please think about it first for yourself... if you got the chance, would you makeout w/ yourself? i'm not as much curious how many people say "yes" but rather how many of those saying "yes" are straight *grin*
he stated it again, "no, over there! your doppelganger!" once again i said, "what?"... well, this went on for a few cycles before i finally said, "no seriously, i have no idea what a doppelganger is." it's at the point that the cycle ended and he told me how a doppelganger was a person's twin, their lookalike, their other-half. and supposedly MY doppelganger was standing right behind me.
so, as covertly at possible, i spun around and began looking for a ruggedly-handsome man in his late 20's w/ a beard and hair that looked like it should have been cut two months ago. whouldn't you know, he WAS standing right behind me, and even more shocking was that, indeed, i found him quite attractive.
that's when i had two revelations only one of which i shared w/ my friends:
1) i am TOTALLY attracted to guys that look similar to me, i.e., facial hair, not primped, kinda rugged-ish, looks like they're quite comfortable in their own skin. note, i'm not attracted to guys LIKE me but that just guys that LOOK like me.
2) if i ever got the chance, i'd totally make out w/ myself.
this last revelation was kinda fun to think about at first but the more i used "doppelganger" in conversation the more i thought about making out w/ myself which made me think more and more that i was a freak.
now before you reply with a resounding "DUH!" please think about it first for yourself... if you got the chance, would you makeout w/ yourself? i'm not as much curious how many people say "yes" but rather how many of those saying "yes" are straight *grin*
01 March, 2007
26 February, 2007
butt dandruff, nasal drip, and the girls
- black shirts frequently give away the wearer's dandruff problem. in the same way, black toilet seats give away the previous pooper's problem. yeah, butt dandruff. what the hell!?!?! i walk into a stall at work and the seat has white flakes on it... seriously dudes, use head & shoulders or t-gel or something, i'm sick of having to wipe your dead ass-skin off the seat before i sit my nice, moisturized, NON-FLAKY ass down to poop.
- i did it. i finally did it. this stuff is the coolest, craziest, most FUN thing to do. odd? maybe... but what do you expect from me?
- i finished the final season of golden girls on sunday afternoon amid a blizzard. the bittersweet experience ended an almost four-year homage to the lovely ladies that bring joy to my life like no other ladies do. rather than watch the final episode as i watch many golden girls episodes: late at night, drunk, and with a bowl of sour-gummies, i waited to watch it when i was completely sober, awake, and able to use up a box of tissues that i conveniently placed next to the couch. i used them... not only was the episode sad but i finished the entire series. *sigh* now i just have to wait for the release of the golden palace.
19 February, 2007
"simple pleasures" or "just really easy to keep happy"???
simple moment of pleasure #524:
walking thru an empty intersection at night and hearing the *click* when the traffic lights switch.
not only are you privy to the amazing experience of being in a location known for being busy while it's so quiet that you can hear an almost-silent *click* but when you hear the *click* the whole world changes around you. what was dark and eerie w/ red overtones turns bright and cheerfully green. you're greeted by a bright white walk sign and it's like the world has, for a short moment, opened it's slowly dozing-off eyes for you.
you're special... you got to hear the *click*! how many people can say they experienced the *click*... or can even say that they were in the moment SO much that they were almost anticipating it...
life is beautiful.
*** addendum after posting ***
dude, i just realized that i ended two posts in a row with "life is beautiful." - huh, cool...
******************************
walking thru an empty intersection at night and hearing the *click* when the traffic lights switch.
not only are you privy to the amazing experience of being in a location known for being busy while it's so quiet that you can hear an almost-silent *click* but when you hear the *click* the whole world changes around you. what was dark and eerie w/ red overtones turns bright and cheerfully green. you're greeted by a bright white walk sign and it's like the world has, for a short moment, opened it's slowly dozing-off eyes for you.
you're special... you got to hear the *click*! how many people can say they experienced the *click*... or can even say that they were in the moment SO much that they were almost anticipating it...
life is beautiful.
*** addendum after posting ***
dude, i just realized that i ended two posts in a row with "life is beautiful." - huh, cool...
******************************
13 February, 2007
rite of passage
tonight when i showed up at my coffee shop and one of the girls asked me what i wanted to drink, the cute guy behind the counter (notice how pretty much every guy is cute to me?) looked at me, grinned, and said "i got it... mug of the lite roast." *grin back*
it's one of the best feelings when you go to your coffee shop and the people know you by name and/or by drink. now both of my coffee shops (caribou coffee in the morning and black dog at night) know me by drink and name.
life is beautiful.
it's one of the best feelings when you go to your coffee shop and the people know you by name and/or by drink. now both of my coffee shops (caribou coffee in the morning and black dog at night) know me by drink and name.
life is beautiful.
11 February, 2007
3m
i get to have drinks w/ my favorite-ist-ist girlfriend monday night.
i've been waiting for this for a week and it's already the best, coolest, night i'm going to have this week.
martinis and mammaries monday. that about sums it up.
who needs valentines day?
i've been waiting for this for a week and it's already the best, coolest, night i'm going to have this week.
martinis and mammaries monday. that about sums it up.
who needs valentines day?
29 January, 2007
2 bribones tras la esmeralda perdida
yeah yeah yeah... i know. but i have a good excuse this time.
picture it, december 2006. a lovely, homosexually-inclined, bitter corporate american sits in his cage reading his email... an email that will end blogging as he knows it: "effective next week we will be installing a new filter on the system and all the following types of sites will be blocked." blogger.com is one of them.
i can't see nor write my blog from work any more... and for those of you know don't realize it, most of my blogging happens when i'm sitting in my cage waiting for the day to end. what is a homosexually-inclined person like myself supposed to do???
when i go home i usually do homework, watch simpsons, eat, then do more homework (i do other things too but my sister reads this blog and i'm sure she doesn't want to hear about her brother crankin' off... oh shit... sorry sis *grin*).
long story short, i'm blogging now.
OMG! i watched for the first time tonight romancing the stone. i cried... michael douglas has NEVER made me feel "that way" before... i love the 80's.
ok, back to studying. i can't promise much, but i surely desire to blog more frequently... lets see how good i can be with that.
*hugs*
picture it, december 2006. a lovely, homosexually-inclined, bitter corporate american sits in his cage reading his email... an email that will end blogging as he knows it: "effective next week we will be installing a new filter on the system and all the following types of sites will be blocked." blogger.com is one of them.
i can't see nor write my blog from work any more... and for those of you know don't realize it, most of my blogging happens when i'm sitting in my cage waiting for the day to end. what is a homosexually-inclined person like myself supposed to do???
when i go home i usually do homework, watch simpsons, eat, then do more homework (i do other things too but my sister reads this blog and i'm sure she doesn't want to hear about her brother crankin' off... oh shit... sorry sis *grin*).
long story short, i'm blogging now.
OMG! i watched for the first time tonight romancing the stone. i cried... michael douglas has NEVER made me feel "that way" before... i love the 80's.
ok, back to studying. i can't promise much, but i surely desire to blog more frequently... lets see how good i can be with that.
*hugs*
08 January, 2007
to amos, with love
watching a 13 year old while his mother is at a school meeting = FREE
spending time with your 13 year old "pseudo-son" = FUN
helping a 13 year old with algebra when he could care less = OHMYFUCKINGODWHERE'STHENEARESTPENCILFORMETOPOKEINMYEYE
for those parents who have teenagers, i truly respect and love you. i will give you the tightest hug whenever i see you next.
for those parents who have children younger than teenagers, i'm storing up hugs for you starting today... payable beginning on the 13th birthday of your spawn.
for those parents who have children past their teens, you're probably partying pretty hard right now... please let me know where you are so i can come over and raise a gin martini to your success.
i love kids, and especially "my" 13 year old for the fun i have with him but also for showing me what it's like to be a parent and for helping me understand a little bit better how you can love someone so much and still want to thump them on the forehead and say "WHY DON'T YOU CARE??? CARE!!!"
i love you amos... here's your first "teen years" hug: *hug*
spending time with your 13 year old "pseudo-son" = FUN
helping a 13 year old with algebra when he could care less = OHMYFUCKINGODWHERE'STHENEARESTPENCILFORMETOPOKEINMYEYE
for those parents who have teenagers, i truly respect and love you. i will give you the tightest hug whenever i see you next.
for those parents who have children younger than teenagers, i'm storing up hugs for you starting today... payable beginning on the 13th birthday of your spawn.
for those parents who have children past their teens, you're probably partying pretty hard right now... please let me know where you are so i can come over and raise a gin martini to your success.
i love kids, and especially "my" 13 year old for the fun i have with him but also for showing me what it's like to be a parent and for helping me understand a little bit better how you can love someone so much and still want to thump them on the forehead and say "WHY DON'T YOU CARE??? CARE!!!"
i love you amos... here's your first "teen years" hug: *hug*
21 December, 2006
happy holiday *jab*
in december of every year a tension rises between belief systems all over the world over the usage of terminology of the particular holidays people celebrate.
merry christmas?
happy chanukah?
cool yule?
happy kwanza?
or the blanket, happy holidays!
when did the acknowledgement that there was more than one holiday at this time of year become so offensive? when did grouping the holidays together in one greeting to cover everyone's holiday cheer become a term that causes people's blood to boil.
i blame the christians. really, i do.
in a country that is primarily christian i've found that the people most offended by "happy holidays" are christians. they're offended because they feel that "happy holidays" is denying the existance of their christmas, that it somehow is meant to ignore christmas, that it's meant to piss them off. well my dear friends, YOU'RE pissing me off.
we don't live in a christian country - we live in a country where the christians believe that they're deserved of a christian nation... personally, a christian nation scares the shit out of me.
i'm not offended by "merry christmas" but i'm definately more attracted to "happy holidays" because it acknowledges that not everyone in this country loves jesus so much that they worship him via boxoffice, vote him into office, or lick the soles of james dobson.
really folks, is it SO terrible to wish EVERYONE the happiest during their holiday - i guess it is, especially if your holiday just so happens to be the wrong one.
merry christmas?
happy chanukah?
cool yule?
happy kwanza?
or the blanket, happy holidays!
when did the acknowledgement that there was more than one holiday at this time of year become so offensive? when did grouping the holidays together in one greeting to cover everyone's holiday cheer become a term that causes people's blood to boil.
i blame the christians. really, i do.
in a country that is primarily christian i've found that the people most offended by "happy holidays" are christians. they're offended because they feel that "happy holidays" is denying the existance of their christmas, that it somehow is meant to ignore christmas, that it's meant to piss them off. well my dear friends, YOU'RE pissing me off.
we don't live in a christian country - we live in a country where the christians believe that they're deserved of a christian nation... personally, a christian nation scares the shit out of me.
i'm not offended by "merry christmas" but i'm definately more attracted to "happy holidays" because it acknowledges that not everyone in this country loves jesus so much that they worship him via boxoffice, vote him into office, or lick the soles of james dobson.
really folks, is it SO terrible to wish EVERYONE the happiest during their holiday - i guess it is, especially if your holiday just so happens to be the wrong one.
18 December, 2006
300th post!!!
*** i just noticed that this is my 300th post! and how appropriate, it's about shitting! ***
question: what do the following things have in common?
answer: they're all things that our bodies MUST do to survive or they're things we MUST do in order to be comfortable in our bodies... and they're all things that we're not allowed to do unless we're in private.
begin rant: why the hell are we so ashamed of the things that we HAVE to do in order to survive? i mean, every human farts. every human poops. every human pisses. every human has to burp or fart at some time. and every human just needs to scratch, itch, and move-it-a-little-to-the-left sometimes. yet we get looked at like we're the most rude person on this celestial ball if we do it outside of our own private universe.
i've even seen people talk about how inappropriate it is to fart loudly in the bathroom... IN THE BATHROOM!?!?!? WHERE ELSE AM I GONNA FART!?!?!
my wish for this yule season isn't for peace on earth or food for every starving child...
i want to be able to fart in a meeting without being embarrassed because everyone else in the meeting understands that i just had to do it otherwise i'd have terrible stomach cramps.
i want to be able to scratch my balls while teaching without being thought of as a perve because my students understand that sometimes, underwear can really be uncomfortable when it bunches-up.
i want to stop hearing my sisters talk about taking dumps in stalls that are next to each other and how funny it was... i want to be in the stall next to them laughing my ass off that one of them just let out a huge fart.
really folks... why are humans such freakin' prudes?
so anyway... 300th post... my gift to you... have a cool yule!
question: what do the following things have in common?
- pooping
- peeing
- that-time-of-the-month-ing
- farting
- burping
- boob adjusting
- ball itching
answer: they're all things that our bodies MUST do to survive or they're things we MUST do in order to be comfortable in our bodies... and they're all things that we're not allowed to do unless we're in private.
begin rant: why the hell are we so ashamed of the things that we HAVE to do in order to survive? i mean, every human farts. every human poops. every human pisses. every human has to burp or fart at some time. and every human just needs to scratch, itch, and move-it-a-little-to-the-left sometimes. yet we get looked at like we're the most rude person on this celestial ball if we do it outside of our own private universe.
i've even seen people talk about how inappropriate it is to fart loudly in the bathroom... IN THE BATHROOM!?!?!? WHERE ELSE AM I GONNA FART!?!?!
my wish for this yule season isn't for peace on earth or food for every starving child...
i want to be able to fart in a meeting without being embarrassed because everyone else in the meeting understands that i just had to do it otherwise i'd have terrible stomach cramps.
i want to be able to scratch my balls while teaching without being thought of as a perve because my students understand that sometimes, underwear can really be uncomfortable when it bunches-up.
i want to stop hearing my sisters talk about taking dumps in stalls that are next to each other and how funny it was... i want to be in the stall next to them laughing my ass off that one of them just let out a huge fart.
really folks... why are humans such freakin' prudes?
so anyway... 300th post... my gift to you... have a cool yule!
13 December, 2006
on blogs and killer orgasms
you know what i really HATE? when you write up an awesome post and use the ever-so-convenient "email" option to email your post to blogger and it bounces back... without your sent message attached so you can at least copy and paste it directly into the site.
boo - hiss
and then you think about writing the post again but the energy just isn't the same. energy is like a killer orgasm, it's only temporary - once it's done it's done. and i mean "killer" as in KICK-ASS, AMAZING, TINGLING... not an orgasm that kills you.
speaking of orgasms that kill you... the other day i was talking to a fairly new friend of mine and she mentioned how she had an INCREDIBLE session of sex w/ her [stunningly gorgeous] husband and afterwards he went to the bathroom and passed out on the tile floor. her face had pure terror in it as she told us that she seriously thought she had killed her husband. and then she followed it with "but at least he had a smile on his face."
thank the GODS that he didn't die... he's a breathlessly HOT canadian dentist who lives in the cities with his equally GORGEOUS and brilliant wife (my new friend).
so there... another post - not the same as the original, but equally as fun and raunchy!
boo - hiss
and then you think about writing the post again but the energy just isn't the same. energy is like a killer orgasm, it's only temporary - once it's done it's done. and i mean "killer" as in KICK-ASS, AMAZING, TINGLING... not an orgasm that kills you.
speaking of orgasms that kill you... the other day i was talking to a fairly new friend of mine and she mentioned how she had an INCREDIBLE session of sex w/ her [stunningly gorgeous] husband and afterwards he went to the bathroom and passed out on the tile floor. her face had pure terror in it as she told us that she seriously thought she had killed her husband. and then she followed it with "but at least he had a smile on his face."
thank the GODS that he didn't die... he's a breathlessly HOT canadian dentist who lives in the cities with his equally GORGEOUS and brilliant wife (my new friend).
so there... another post - not the same as the original, but equally as fun and raunchy!
05 December, 2006
rites of winter
rites of winter, everybody's got them. you know, those moments that make you stop and think "*gasp* that's the first [insert rite here] of winter! man i LOVE winter!"
my rites of winter (in no particular order):
it's all so fantastic, so refreshing, so alive. i don't get it, people complaining about winter... to me it's the earth finally saying to us "see here you little shit... i DO have control over you!" and all you can do is lean back, put another blanket on the bed, put another shot of whiskey in your coffee, and say "have at it, jack frost."
it's nice to give up control every once in a while, isn't it? *grin*
my rites of winter (in no particular order):
- the first snowfall
- the first sub-zero temperature (NOT counting wind chill)
- wearing your stocking hat in the coffee shop
- wearing gloves for the first time
- the first time your nostrils freeze together
- days without sunshine
- the moment you realize your car is warmed-up enough that you can take your gloves off
- static electricity
it's all so fantastic, so refreshing, so alive. i don't get it, people complaining about winter... to me it's the earth finally saying to us "see here you little shit... i DO have control over you!" and all you can do is lean back, put another blanket on the bed, put another shot of whiskey in your coffee, and say "have at it, jack frost."
it's nice to give up control every once in a while, isn't it? *grin*
30 November, 2006
the better person
i have every reason in the entire universe to be the biggest BITCH today.
but i choose to rise above my trials.
i have every reason in the whole of corporate america to be an ASS HOLE this very minute.
but i choose to be the stronger employee.
i have every right in the world to be PISSED OFF BEYOND BELIEF as i write this.
but i choose to let my irritabilities disapperate.
i choose to take a deep breath, recognize that some things you just can't control, remember that everyone is allowed their opinion, that everyone makes mistakes, that sometimes the best thing to do is walk away, that silence is truly golden, that gossip ultimately hurts someone, and that this evening holds the promise of a warm and cozy bed for me to rest in at which time i can let this day finally fizzle away into mere memories in my mind.
but i choose to rise above my trials.
i have every reason in the whole of corporate america to be an ASS HOLE this very minute.
but i choose to be the stronger employee.
i have every right in the world to be PISSED OFF BEYOND BELIEF as i write this.
but i choose to let my irritabilities disapperate.
i choose to take a deep breath, recognize that some things you just can't control, remember that everyone is allowed their opinion, that everyone makes mistakes, that sometimes the best thing to do is walk away, that silence is truly golden, that gossip ultimately hurts someone, and that this evening holds the promise of a warm and cozy bed for me to rest in at which time i can let this day finally fizzle away into mere memories in my mind.
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