the train of death

i know many bad smells... MANY:

• poop
  
• pee
  
• b.o.
  
• bad breath
  
• ass-rot
  
• rotton food
  
• slaughtered animals
  
• belly button lint
  
• vomit
  
• "asparagus" piss
  
• lesbian

but when i got on the south-bound red-line train on thursday night i ran into an odor so hideous, so amazingly putrid, so beautifully evil that i could do nothing but think it had to be the one thing that i think i really don't know... dead human body.

i swear to all that is holy that someone died and rotted for at least seven and a half hours in that train car. i think the others in the train would have agreed w/ me too.

what did i do? did i go to a new car? did i sneak to the next train or just wait on the platform for the next train?

no... like a fuckin' lemming i sat on the train of death and covered my nose and mouth.

i can't tell you how many people got on the train and did the same as me... dumb asses. but the people i was the most impressed with were some drunk and VERY obnoxious kids that got on the train, spilled more expletives than i could even muster up (imagine that...) and at the next stop got out and ran up to the next train.

i have to say, i was very impressed with those kids and was pretty jealous that i hadn't stood up for my own nose and done the same.