i'm FINALLY getting the internet at home tonight (thank you comcast). and now my blog will be updated on a regular basis again!
p.s. amber, you are so sweet... i miss you tons.
16 November, 2005
02 September, 2005
10 things i DON'T miss about driving to work
10. the variance in my schedule created by the ultimate flexability of not being tied the schedule of someone else (namely, metrotransit).
9. breaking a sweat walking 10 minutes in the sweltering morning heat from my parking lot.
8. being too lazy to walk that healthy 10 minutes and taking the bus, thus making me feel guilty for being a lazy ass for at least 4 seconds.
7. having to talk to people on the bus because... well... you know them.
6. having to be happy with that WAY too happy 8:04 21A bus driver.
5. dumbass drivers.
4. traffic.
3. driving INTO the sun.
2. feeling like a gas guzzling asshole who doesn't care about the environment enough to take one of the two bus routes that go RIGHT BY MY HOUSE into work.
1. driving next to (and battling road rage of) gas guzzling, s.u.v. driving, fishy and bush sticker sticking, non-blinker using, speed-up-so-i-can-get-in-front-of-you-ering, assholes.
9. breaking a sweat walking 10 minutes in the sweltering morning heat from my parking lot.
8. being too lazy to walk that healthy 10 minutes and taking the bus, thus making me feel guilty for being a lazy ass for at least 4 seconds.
7. having to talk to people on the bus because... well... you know them.
6. having to be happy with that WAY too happy 8:04 21A bus driver.
5. dumbass drivers.
4. traffic.
3. driving INTO the sun.
2. feeling like a gas guzzling asshole who doesn't care about the environment enough to take one of the two bus routes that go RIGHT BY MY HOUSE into work.
1. driving next to (and battling road rage of) gas guzzling, s.u.v. driving, fishy and bush sticker sticking, non-blinker using, speed-up-so-i-can-get-in-front-of-you-ering, assholes.
31 August, 2005
i'm so dizzy... i'm so dizzy my head is spinning...
i loved that song as a kid. i'd stand in the living room and spin in circles till i fell on the ground... well... dizzy!
that's kind of how i feel right now actually. between a job thats at high stress-levels, a show that's opening in 2 weeks, not being completely off-book for said show, gas prices over 3 dollars a gallon, and a dumb-ass president and right-wing neo-cons hell-bent on solidifying my sub-human status on this planet -- *sigh* -- i'm... well... dizzy!
but, oh, is life good or what!?!?! i mean, i'm continually blessed by the heavens and am for some reason i'm not reacting too badly to the stress. i find times to relax and i find times to... well... not relax. the only thing really lacking is a sex life, but i guess you can't have everything = )
that's kind of how i feel right now actually. between a job thats at high stress-levels, a show that's opening in 2 weeks, not being completely off-book for said show, gas prices over 3 dollars a gallon, and a dumb-ass president and right-wing neo-cons hell-bent on solidifying my sub-human status on this planet -- *sigh* -- i'm... well... dizzy!
but, oh, is life good or what!?!?! i mean, i'm continually blessed by the heavens and am for some reason i'm not reacting too badly to the stress. i find times to relax and i find times to... well... not relax. the only thing really lacking is a sex life, but i guess you can't have everything = )
12 August, 2005
s.a. all the way
i'm even more so in love with my super america than i've ever been.
besides the fact that they have the CUTEST night manager guy (with the cutest butt) but last night when i went in to pay for my gas (and get my cigs) the guy behind the counter refused to start up a customer's gas pump because he could see (through his binoculars) that he hadn't turned off his engine.
now, i have no idea, but this may be standard protocol for gas station workers, but i just hadn't thought of it till it happened.
I LOVE YOU SUPER AMERICA NIGHT WORKER WHO WORKS WITH THE REALLY CUTE SUPER AMERICA NIGHT MANAGER FOR STOPPING SOME DUMBASS ON LAKE STREET FROM BLOWING ME AND MY MAZDA TO HEAVEN AND BACK!!!
besides the fact that they have the CUTEST night manager guy (with the cutest butt) but last night when i went in to pay for my gas (and get my cigs) the guy behind the counter refused to start up a customer's gas pump because he could see (through his binoculars) that he hadn't turned off his engine.
now, i have no idea, but this may be standard protocol for gas station workers, but i just hadn't thought of it till it happened.
I LOVE YOU SUPER AMERICA NIGHT WORKER WHO WORKS WITH THE REALLY CUTE SUPER AMERICA NIGHT MANAGER FOR STOPPING SOME DUMBASS ON LAKE STREET FROM BLOWING ME AND MY MAZDA TO HEAVEN AND BACK!!!
11 August, 2005
tap -n- grill
LONG-ASS dance rehearsal last night that ended at the tap -n- grill in the maplewood/oakdale area.
four of use went in there and ordered the following:
total??? $43.
now... usually i'm one to sing the curses of the cesspool i call suburbia... but i just can't find the notes for the song right now. i'm thoroughly impressed with this unique non-big-box suburban bar & grille. huh... $43... i almost crapped my pants when i saw that bill...
four of use went in there and ordered the following:
- 13+ beers
- hot wings
- cheese nachos
- onion rings
- two orders of fried cheese curds
- a HUGE piece of chocolate cake... no really... it was about 8" tall
total??? $43.
now... usually i'm one to sing the curses of the cesspool i call suburbia... but i just can't find the notes for the song right now. i'm thoroughly impressed with this unique non-big-box suburban bar & grille. huh... $43... i almost crapped my pants when i saw that bill...
09 August, 2005
04 August, 2005
carmina burana
reminder to all my friends - carmina burana is this saturday at orchestra hall in minneapolis at 8pm. this is the only showing of this amazing piece.
150 voice choir
40 voice boys choir
full minnesota orchestra on extended stage
for those who are unfamiliar with this piece - carmina burana is a bunch of poems that were set to song by karl orff. a majority of the songs are a progression of fate in the lives of extremely horny youth. yes, you saw that right, they're really REALLY horny = )
the piece has some extremely familiar tunes including the opening and closing "oh fortuna" which is considered one of the loudest and most obnoxious pieces of choral/orchestral music ever. the other one is the "tempus est incundo" which will be extremely familiar to yergie! remember in sydney when we sang for that college choir and they sang their "oh... oh... ooooh, totus flore-o" song? the one we sang as a choir over and over and over on the bus??? yeah... carmina burana baby!
this is a kick-ass piece that is very seductive, sexy, obnoxious, and just plain ol amazing. if you're in the cities, you MUST check it out - i guarantee you'll be blown away!
150 voice choir
40 voice boys choir
full minnesota orchestra on extended stage
for those who are unfamiliar with this piece - carmina burana is a bunch of poems that were set to song by karl orff. a majority of the songs are a progression of fate in the lives of extremely horny youth. yes, you saw that right, they're really REALLY horny = )
the piece has some extremely familiar tunes including the opening and closing "oh fortuna" which is considered one of the loudest and most obnoxious pieces of choral/orchestral music ever. the other one is the "tempus est incundo" which will be extremely familiar to yergie! remember in sydney when we sang for that college choir and they sang their "oh... oh... ooooh, totus flore-o" song? the one we sang as a choir over and over and over on the bus??? yeah... carmina burana baby!
this is a kick-ass piece that is very seductive, sexy, obnoxious, and just plain ol amazing. if you're in the cities, you MUST check it out - i guarantee you'll be blown away!
03 August, 2005
estelle getty and harvey firestein
i just finished reading "torch song trilogy" and have to say that i was pretty impressed.
i also can't stop thinking about how the first part seems to be very much so like a relationship i had a long time ago... oddly enough it went in the same direction and just recently things from the second part started happening too. it kinda caused me to just stop and think for a second about life.
if you haven't read it i would suggest it strongly. it's a really good set of plays that document the relationship between a gay man and his ex-lover, a bi man. some parts were very close to home... others i pray to god i won't have to experience in my life.
i also can't stop thinking about how the first part seems to be very much so like a relationship i had a long time ago... oddly enough it went in the same direction and just recently things from the second part started happening too. it kinda caused me to just stop and think for a second about life.
if you haven't read it i would suggest it strongly. it's a really good set of plays that document the relationship between a gay man and his ex-lover, a bi man. some parts were very close to home... others i pray to god i won't have to experience in my life.
01 August, 2005
1 rant and 1 randomization about mother nature
holy shit it's august.
in high school i heard that the older you get the faster life moves around you. the rationale was that when you're two days old a day makes up 1/2 your life and your perception of that "1/2" life seems pretty long. the older you get, each day becomes less and and less compared to the rest of what you've experienced in life, thus making days and months and years seem insignificantly short.
i couldn't agree more.
i camped this weekend. once again, becoming one with nature is quite possibly one of my favorite past-times (besides talking about dirty raunchy things). i used my new tent and sat around the campfire for hours doing nothing w/ my friend gary. as we were leaving yesterday afternoon we realized that we didn't drink an ounce of the vodka we brought along... well, we played with by spitting it on the fire to see how cool it'd look, but other than that, none got ingested.
and that's what it's all about... letting nature intoxicate you with her amazing ability to subdue all your senses and take you into her arms for a short respite from life as we know it.
we took a short walk to a pier that went into the saint croix river... we watched the stars for 45 minutes or so. we saw 5 shooting starts, 4 satellites, and only 2 aero-planes. what a fantastic feeling, when you've been staring at the stars for so long that when you finally see a plane, you have to double-take because it just looks weird.
ahhhh.
in high school i heard that the older you get the faster life moves around you. the rationale was that when you're two days old a day makes up 1/2 your life and your perception of that "1/2" life seems pretty long. the older you get, each day becomes less and and less compared to the rest of what you've experienced in life, thus making days and months and years seem insignificantly short.
i couldn't agree more.
i camped this weekend. once again, becoming one with nature is quite possibly one of my favorite past-times (besides talking about dirty raunchy things). i used my new tent and sat around the campfire for hours doing nothing w/ my friend gary. as we were leaving yesterday afternoon we realized that we didn't drink an ounce of the vodka we brought along... well, we played with by spitting it on the fire to see how cool it'd look, but other than that, none got ingested.
and that's what it's all about... letting nature intoxicate you with her amazing ability to subdue all your senses and take you into her arms for a short respite from life as we know it.
we took a short walk to a pier that went into the saint croix river... we watched the stars for 45 minutes or so. we saw 5 shooting starts, 4 satellites, and only 2 aero-planes. what a fantastic feeling, when you've been staring at the stars for so long that when you finally see a plane, you have to double-take because it just looks weird.
ahhhh.
28 July, 2005
crazy-perfect-hair guy
he rides the #53 at 7:05am every morning and at 4:25pm every afternoon. he gets on at my stop in the morning but gets off 4 blocks before that same stop in the afternoon.
he's one of those riders that is constantly jittery - looking around anxiously, ready to do whatever he's waiting to do 5 minutes before life will allowed him to do it.
he's a professional man. mid 50's. dressed very nicely. he carries a kenneth cole bag. his hair is salt & pepper with a more generous amount of former. his hair always looks tediously (aka, o.c.d.-ish-ly) done. he's crazy-perfect-hair guy.
in the morning, he casually paces in different directions within an invisible 4ft-wide circle. about 2 times a minute he anxiously walks to the middle of the street to see if the bus is coming then hastily comes back to the curb to continue his pacing.
in the afternoon, he gets out of his seat at least 2 blocks or more before his stop which isn't unusual except that there is long stoplight between those two blocks and in the time we are stopped, he again casually paces between the back door of the bus and his seat.
once he even walked to the front of the bus to get off then changed his mind and walked to the back of the bus and used that door instead.
he doesn't look at all crazy or weird - you wouldn't look at him twice if you saw him walking down the street. cliche' time - "it's what's inside that counts" (i.e., he looks normal on the outside but inside he's CA-RAY-ZY!!!).
he doesn't really bother me, but he does make me fairly anxious when i pay attention to him.
people are funny sometimes.
he's one of those riders that is constantly jittery - looking around anxiously, ready to do whatever he's waiting to do 5 minutes before life will allowed him to do it.
he's a professional man. mid 50's. dressed very nicely. he carries a kenneth cole bag. his hair is salt & pepper with a more generous amount of former. his hair always looks tediously (aka, o.c.d.-ish-ly) done. he's crazy-perfect-hair guy.
in the morning, he casually paces in different directions within an invisible 4ft-wide circle. about 2 times a minute he anxiously walks to the middle of the street to see if the bus is coming then hastily comes back to the curb to continue his pacing.
in the afternoon, he gets out of his seat at least 2 blocks or more before his stop which isn't unusual except that there is long stoplight between those two blocks and in the time we are stopped, he again casually paces between the back door of the bus and his seat.
once he even walked to the front of the bus to get off then changed his mind and walked to the back of the bus and used that door instead.
he doesn't look at all crazy or weird - you wouldn't look at him twice if you saw him walking down the street. cliche' time - "it's what's inside that counts" (i.e., he looks normal on the outside but inside he's CA-RAY-ZY!!!).
he doesn't really bother me, but he does make me fairly anxious when i pay attention to him.
people are funny sometimes.
26 July, 2005
HAY! (straw is cheaper, grass is free - marry a farmer and you get all three!)
ok, this is SO cool! i now know the difference between hay, straw, and grass!!!
so there you go! the difference between hay, straw, and grass. now go impress someone who doesn't read this blog.
- hay
what it is: hay is a combination of alfalfa and grass that is raked into rows on a field and left to dry in the summer sun. once mostly dried, hay is baled.
how it is used: hay is used as feed for animals - it's healthy and hearty!
rough market price: $2.00 a bale
- straw
what is is: straw is the remains of combined (harvested) oats, wheat, barley, etc. it is mostly stalks and such.
how it is used: straw is not healthy. it is used primarily as bedding for animals and christmas pagents.
rough market price: $.50 a bale
- grass
what it is: grass grows naturally in fields and some yards. in suburbia it is planted in yards, baseball diamonds, and in over-priced pots at floral shops.
how it is used: grass can be eaten, layed in, rolled on, played on, watered, sexed on, eaten on, cut, and harvested for multch (if you love and care for the earth that you're so fortunate to be living on).
rough market price: free
so there you go! the difference between hay, straw, and grass. now go impress someone who doesn't read this blog.
25 July, 2005
the circle of life
yesterday i found out that an ex's uncle died at age 57. normally, this news wouldn't mean too much to me, as a matter of fact, i probably wouldn't care at all. this one was different though.
his uncle was gay. he had a partner. he was the first person most of his family ever knew of to be gay. he was also a figure that my ex looked up to very much. as a gay man, as a gay man in a relationship, as a gay man in a family that had accepted him and his partner.
i haven't really talked to this ex for almost 3 years now, since we broke-up. i still feel bad for the reason he stopped talking to me, but a person can only apologize so many times.
i sent him a card today telling him how sad i was to hear the news, and to wish him well.
as i sealed the card i had an overwhelming wave of sadness come over me.
i hope i hear from him again some day - i'd really like to patch things up between him and i.
his uncle was gay. he had a partner. he was the first person most of his family ever knew of to be gay. he was also a figure that my ex looked up to very much. as a gay man, as a gay man in a relationship, as a gay man in a family that had accepted him and his partner.
i haven't really talked to this ex for almost 3 years now, since we broke-up. i still feel bad for the reason he stopped talking to me, but a person can only apologize so many times.
i sent him a card today telling him how sad i was to hear the news, and to wish him well.
as i sealed the card i had an overwhelming wave of sadness come over me.
i hope i hear from him again some day - i'd really like to patch things up between him and i.
22 July, 2005
ahhh
WOW!
last night i meditated and did a realignment ritual... what a difference! this morning i can't explain how much better i feel, so much more whole and put-together!
i woke up early and have been quite on the ball so far, i mean, it's only 8:59 and i've already worked on and completed two projects here at work!
oh, and as a side note, the soundtrack to the charlie & the chocolate factory kicks some major ass. i mean it. go see the movie, it's hillarious and so visually/audibly stimulating. the cool thing was that it didn't seem to want to compete with the gene wilder version of the movie... the movies are the same but oh so different... major props to tim burton on this one!
last night i meditated and did a realignment ritual... what a difference! this morning i can't explain how much better i feel, so much more whole and put-together!
i woke up early and have been quite on the ball so far, i mean, it's only 8:59 and i've already worked on and completed two projects here at work!
oh, and as a side note, the soundtrack to the charlie & the chocolate factory kicks some major ass. i mean it. go see the movie, it's hillarious and so visually/audibly stimulating. the cool thing was that it didn't seem to want to compete with the gene wilder version of the movie... the movies are the same but oh so different... major props to tim burton on this one!
21 July, 2005
facts about my day so far...
- i woke up at 6:45 this morning
- i forgot my xcel energy bill at home so i can't set it up on auto bill pay now
- i'm tired, although i wasn't really up late
- i shaved this morning
- i just finished chewing a jawbreaker
- i'm pretty sure i have a.d.d.
- there was a really hot guy in the cafeteria today at lunch, the girls and i especially like his arms and his butt
- i haven't had any caffeine yet today
- i don't want to go to rehearsal tonight, i just want to sit at home and drink and smoke and watch porn
- well, not really drink, smoke, and watch porn... just the... well... yeah, i guess i meant all three
- my energy is NOT aligned very well today, as a matter of fact, i feel horribly unaligned right now... i should meditate or something when i get home to get my mind in the right place again
- i just got windows xp service pak 2!!! i'm really excited about this... and the sad part of it all is that i'm actually, factually excited, not just shitting for blog purposes
- i'm going to get coffee, screw this = )
20 July, 2005
html
i'm in an html/javascripting class right now and i'm learn-ding a ton of really cool new shit. don't be surprised if i all of a sudden start going crazy on my blog... whoo hoo!!!
18 July, 2005
the original summer adventure
"GARAGE SALES!!!" said my extremely excited friend on saturday morning. "GARAGE SALES EVERYWHERE!!! i didn't go to any so that we could go together." how thoughtful of him.
thus began our 5 hour garage sale romp.
most people wander across a garage sale sign and then hesitantly stop. others who are crazy plan out their day by reading the paper and plotting out a route, we were the craziest of all garage salers... we just drove till we found one. sure, it doesn't sound crazy, but try driving up and down streets for 1/2 hour looking for something that may or may not exist anywhere nearby. but the greatest thing about THIS version of the garage saling day is that you happen across neighborhoods that you've never seen before... how FUN!
my garage sales finds on 7/16/05:
camping stove
brand new, untouched, unassembled, in original box
$10 WHAT A DEAL!!!
misc pottery
the cutest bud vase a very nice blue vase and a hand made cup. the blue vase came w/ a story of how the owner watched the potter make it in waikiki
$12
misc books and a ceramic cross
random classics and books i've been wanting to read and a very cute ceramic cross that looks quite fresh above my bedroom door (more on that later though)
$3.50
cup and saucer set (8 pc)
oh my GOD! the CUTEST seafoam green milk-glass cup and saucer set for 8. the PERFECT antique ending to a meal AND they'll look FABU with my pure white place settings!!!
$15 A TOTAL STEAL!
total spent: $40.50
so there you have it, kids. my garage saling days for this last weekend. i'll be sure to let you know of future adventures = )
thus began our 5 hour garage sale romp.
most people wander across a garage sale sign and then hesitantly stop. others who are crazy plan out their day by reading the paper and plotting out a route, we were the craziest of all garage salers... we just drove till we found one. sure, it doesn't sound crazy, but try driving up and down streets for 1/2 hour looking for something that may or may not exist anywhere nearby. but the greatest thing about THIS version of the garage saling day is that you happen across neighborhoods that you've never seen before... how FUN!
my garage sales finds on 7/16/05:
brand new, untouched, unassembled, in original box
$10 WHAT A DEAL!!!
the cutest bud vase a very nice blue vase and a hand made cup. the blue vase came w/ a story of how the owner watched the potter make it in waikiki
$12
random classics and books i've been wanting to read and a very cute ceramic cross that looks quite fresh above my bedroom door (more on that later though)
$3.50
oh my GOD! the CUTEST seafoam green milk-glass cup and saucer set for 8. the PERFECT antique ending to a meal AND they'll look FABU with my pure white place settings!!!
$15 A TOTAL STEAL!
total spent: $40.50
so there you have it, kids. my garage saling days for this last weekend. i'll be sure to let you know of future adventures = )
15 July, 2005
ringtones
most people think of specially-downloaded ringtones on cellphones as one of those becoming-more-frequent trendy and expensive annoyances in everyday life. you know, teenagers spending mom and dad's well-earned cash on unnecessary clips of britany or another slutty singer just to be cool.
i for one, though, think of them as totally different. yes, i've bought 3 (count them, 3) ringtones in the 6+ years i've had a cellphone. rather than being trendy, i choose to put these ringtones on my phone because every time i hear them i go on a walk down memory lane... every time i get a call i feel all warm inside because of the tones i've picked-out.
ringtone #1 - the theme from fraggle rock - yes! fraggle rock! one of my FAVORITE shows as a kid... just the sound of the theme song makes me smile and sing.
ringtone #2 - blue (eiffel 65). remember that semi-annoying disco song from the millennium-change-up days? THOSE were my out days, my days at the disco, the days with my friends at the club, to me this song is me at the max with my hands thrown to the heavens, drunker than my boyfriend the alcoholic, wishing these moments to never end.
ringtone #3 - the theme from neverending story. this one i just bought last night. one of the movies that my sisters, and whole family actually, watched over and over and over. we LOVED to sing the theme song and put other words to it, for instance: "never-ending stinky feet, ahhhhhhhhhh... never-ending stinky feet, ahhhhhhhh"
you see, the warmth i get every time a friend calls is so cool.
at $1.99/tone... 3 tones... $5.97 is worth it to me.
i for one, though, think of them as totally different. yes, i've bought 3 (count them, 3) ringtones in the 6+ years i've had a cellphone. rather than being trendy, i choose to put these ringtones on my phone because every time i hear them i go on a walk down memory lane... every time i get a call i feel all warm inside because of the tones i've picked-out.
ringtone #1 - the theme from fraggle rock - yes! fraggle rock! one of my FAVORITE shows as a kid... just the sound of the theme song makes me smile and sing.
ringtone #2 - blue (eiffel 65). remember that semi-annoying disco song from the millennium-change-up days? THOSE were my out days, my days at the disco, the days with my friends at the club, to me this song is me at the max with my hands thrown to the heavens, drunker than my boyfriend the alcoholic, wishing these moments to never end.
ringtone #3 - the theme from neverending story. this one i just bought last night. one of the movies that my sisters, and whole family actually, watched over and over and over. we LOVED to sing the theme song and put other words to it, for instance: "never-ending stinky feet, ahhhhhhhhhh... never-ending stinky feet, ahhhhhhhh"
you see, the warmth i get every time a friend calls is so cool.
at $1.99/tone... 3 tones... $5.97 is worth it to me.
01 June, 2005
warm fuzzies
isn't it amazing how life flies by you - i mean, it's march one second and then it's june. it's like, what the hell!?!?! where did april and may go? i want my 2nd quarter back dammit!
*grin*
so this last weekend (memorial day) was one of the funnest weekends i've had in years. my [first] ex and his softball team came down from seattle for the big northstar classic softball tournament (gay leagues).
WHAT A BLAST!!!
not only did i excessively drink on friday, saturday, sunday, and monday - but i got to watch amazing softball matches and see some really killer bodies.
randy's team (aka, the ex's team) won first place in their [b] division!!! and the other seattle team won first in their [d] division!!! S-E-A-T-T-L-E, SEATTLE!!! SEATTLE!!!
in addition to all of this i also got to spend some quality time w/ randy. we have a special story actually, we're each other's first boyfriends, and consequently each other's firt ex too = ) after breaking-up, geeze, almost 6 years ago now, we lived together for 1.5 years still - to this day, he's still one of my closest friends, and the only ex that i'm still really good friends with.
and there's always a tiny part of your heart that belongs to them. even though there's not a frickin' OUNCE of desire to be back together with them, you still look at them and grin remembering about all you've been through together.
it's a true blessing that randy and i have such a strong friendship after all these years - we've been there for each other in some really tough times (like break-ups and moving) and some really good times (like babies, engagements, and dancing to the bee gee's just the other day at the memorial day bbq).
weekends like this are few and far between - but when they come, i'm glad i'm able to sit back and truly appreciate them.
*grin*
so this last weekend (memorial day) was one of the funnest weekends i've had in years. my [first] ex and his softball team came down from seattle for the big northstar classic softball tournament (gay leagues).
WHAT A BLAST!!!
not only did i excessively drink on friday, saturday, sunday, and monday - but i got to watch amazing softball matches and see some really killer bodies.
randy's team (aka, the ex's team) won first place in their [b] division!!! and the other seattle team won first in their [d] division!!! S-E-A-T-T-L-E, SEATTLE!!! SEATTLE!!!
in addition to all of this i also got to spend some quality time w/ randy. we have a special story actually, we're each other's first boyfriends, and consequently each other's firt ex too = ) after breaking-up, geeze, almost 6 years ago now, we lived together for 1.5 years still - to this day, he's still one of my closest friends, and the only ex that i'm still really good friends with.
and there's always a tiny part of your heart that belongs to them. even though there's not a frickin' OUNCE of desire to be back together with them, you still look at them and grin remembering about all you've been through together.
it's a true blessing that randy and i have such a strong friendship after all these years - we've been there for each other in some really tough times (like break-ups and moving) and some really good times (like babies, engagements, and dancing to the bee gee's just the other day at the memorial day bbq).
weekends like this are few and far between - but when they come, i'm glad i'm able to sit back and truly appreciate them.
11 May, 2005
hi
i really don't have anything to say.
the cheap and tawdry sideshow starts-up tomorrow.
verdi's requiem is in a few weeks.
i'm teaching today.
i have my church directory picture tomorrow.
i'm ready for a vacation that is destined to not happen.
i need a haircut.
more to come, i promise... man, this blog is lame-o lately = )
the cheap and tawdry sideshow starts-up tomorrow.
verdi's requiem is in a few weeks.
i'm teaching today.
i have my church directory picture tomorrow.
i'm ready for a vacation that is destined to not happen.
i need a haircut.
more to come, i promise... man, this blog is lame-o lately = )
03 May, 2005
songs for the spirit
in december of this past year, my heart was deeply touched by a jason and demarco concert at all gods children mcc here in minneapolis.
i remember listening to their "songs for the spirit" cd almost the entire way back to omaha for christmas. i also remember driving through rural nebraska, merely 10 miles from the christian university that hurt me so much, singing songs i never thought i'd sing again and that made me sob because of an amazing feeling of finally reaching the place where i could sing songs of praise to god without feeling the slightest bit of guilt or pain or condemnation.
in those moments, i was not only one with the spirit but all was truly well with my soul.
i listened to this cd again today at work and was amazed at how the music touched me so powerfully again. i found myself crying tears of joy and thanking god for never leaving me through the years of trial that i've been through. i also found myself praising him in my own way for proving to me that no matter what happens in this world around me and no matter how blind some people may be, the truth powerfully lies in this foundational truth: sometimes god chooses to display himself to us simply through his actions rather than through his words.
i remember listening to their "songs for the spirit" cd almost the entire way back to omaha for christmas. i also remember driving through rural nebraska, merely 10 miles from the christian university that hurt me so much, singing songs i never thought i'd sing again and that made me sob because of an amazing feeling of finally reaching the place where i could sing songs of praise to god without feeling the slightest bit of guilt or pain or condemnation.
in those moments, i was not only one with the spirit but all was truly well with my soul.
i listened to this cd again today at work and was amazed at how the music touched me so powerfully again. i found myself crying tears of joy and thanking god for never leaving me through the years of trial that i've been through. i also found myself praising him in my own way for proving to me that no matter what happens in this world around me and no matter how blind some people may be, the truth powerfully lies in this foundational truth: sometimes god chooses to display himself to us simply through his actions rather than through his words.
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